love – Frozen Spaghetti

Thanksgiving Rain Makes Me Freshly Thankful

November 24, 2022by ErinLeave a Comment

When we got the tree yesterday, Thanksgiving Eve, the sky was so blue with marbled clouds and the sun was happy, warming the skin .

The girls were funny discerning shades of green, texture of branches, the shape. I smiled as Part One of this year’s book – A Christmas Tree Story – is about how Christmas Trees are chosen and at one point my oldest daughter yelled out to my youngest, “Didn’t you read mom’s book? No Christmas Tree is more perfect than another!” hahaha even now… the prose… making its way into my reality.

In my previous post, I mentioned how life has changed and for sure I thought that my reveal of how it changed was going to come in a poetic musing about taking the dogs out in the morning with both hands on my cup of coffee and being able to take in the morning sky because… drumroll… we have a new beautiful gorgeous life changing fence.

For two years, taking them out for relief in the morning has required putting them on leashes, dressing for the weather, and – most days – spinning around while they chase each other on the leashes while I try not to spill my coffee in my opposite hand.

The fence brings this ridiculous amount of freedom and nourishing relief. And though I did go out with them yesterday to take in the morning and though it certainly was life changing – here I am now on Thanksgiving, bringing my online diary to present alongside candlelight and rain.

Steady heavyish rain.

The poetic musing noting heavy themes of freedom when going outside is actually more deeply acknowledging the freedom and relief of staying inside, the knowing they can run out in the rain and I don’t have to… is as genuinely relieving as its opposite. I didn’t love the forecast of rain but here it is now, showing me a new part of my reality. My ability to stay in, reminding me of how life unfolds to teach us…

Smiling now. I think it is important to remember that not only does all hard and all work have its opposite if easy and relief, but that said opposites have opposites within (which then have opposites within, which then have opposites within).

This ongoing understanding life changes and unfolds both as we shift gears or make decisions but then also as those decisions and shifts change what is going on opens us up to mystery.

Who will ever sit and really – truly – figure out all the which ways something will turn and surprise us.

And if they do, is that present moment living?

The Little Red Hen in me feels charmed by her morning task becoming lighter here on Thanksgiving in a way different than I anticipated experiencing…

Now on to set out the turkey, turn the kitchen on and start the day…

The joy of finding the tree mixed with the work and not so much joy of it giving us hives

Words in Sentences

“The Most Excellent Way” @ Monday Devotion time in my study

March 1, 2021by ErinLeave a Comment

One of the best most helpful things a spiritual coach told me in all of this life upheaval is that as a woman designed in Gods image, when I create – I must remember I am reflecting an aspect of the divine. To therefore treat the time as worship and be humble in my pursuits, gentle to receive direction and open minded in what creative project the Lord may be asking of me that may or may not align with my own plans.

After returning home from high school drop offs, I made a quick brain dump of what I would like to do to, what I need to do, etc.

There is cohesion in my various threads of thought – so that is hopeful. There is also a serious need to sit and do the things relative to each thread of thought and this consistency to sit is the common denominator. So get this –

Today, instead of thinking “I only have two hours to get all this work done”, I thought to myself “I only have a 2 hour work day – isn’t that lucky?”

I showered and got dressed and made the man a plate of fruit and peanut butter. I considered the track from our room to my study “my commute” and didn’t make the bed… bc there might be traffic. And I wanted to be in the office on time.

“Oh so now she starts caring”, all former bosses and coworkers who read this blog collectively groan. Again… time and attendance, not my speciality.

I’m in my devotional / reflective time and in lighting incense and sitting with my mind space, I got the word “love” on which to ponder and ground myself for the day.

Naturally, I went to 1 Corinthians 13 (a classic) but found myself smiling at the unexpected refreshing-ness of the lead in to 13, “…and now I will show you the most excellent way”.

The way of love. A way that only is when you are actively spirit led. However that is for you and your intuitive self and body – however that is for your conscious breath and attendance to yourself.

The way of love is the most excellent way. Just love the simplicity for today.

Now to work, I don’t want to catch myself on my phone.

PS David brought me home a strip of white board on Saturday 😍

Words in Sentences

It All Catches Up With You @ Sitting on a Part of the Couch on the Front Deck, Bellingham

August 14, 2020August 14, 2020by ErinLeave a Comment

It all catches up with you: moments, memories, meaning.

We decided to delay our departure a day to give a nice 24 hour buffer, prevent stress and maximize efficiencies and time along favorite coordinates.

I got a chance to properly pack the rental van, pack lunches, pack coolers, make a cat hut / cat fort and as the house emptied, I would have these moments where my eyes swallowed the bare floors or the sunset and see them in both the first way and the now way.

I remember my first visit up here and being confused; not only by the obvious task of looking for things in a new kitchen but also in wondering why he had so many things of baking powder.

Now, the kitchen is organized by my handiwork and, although David still tends to have multiples of things, that no longer confuses me. I know how he operates and how, for him – it’s easier just to buy it and have it than to make a list and take inventory before leaving the house.

(Multiply that by the fact Kara (11 year old step daughter) bakes and he grocery shops as a sport; you get a lot of cinnamon, vanilla extract and baking powder.)

Anyway….

There is a picture of him that I took putting our to go coffees together before my early morning flight out after that first visit up here. It’s my favorite – I remember thinking “he is so handsome” and “I like his style” and “I’m proud of him”.

It’s hard for me at times to see him leaving Washington. He loves it up here, he just moved up here two years ago, and I know if we could root here we would grow something we both are so intrigued by.

That being said, I really truly know that we are still actively rooting – regardless of city. And I really truly know what we grow is very intriguing. Lastly, I believe leaving here does not negate the very cool, very whole hearted thing he did moving up here two years ago.

David continually shows his kids, me and now my daughters a generosity and a willingness that births adventure. I think he shows a boat load of patience, creativity and ethic that fruit a home.

He “gives” more than he “sacrifices” and I found myself moving through the house I know now like the back of my hand feeling this “wow he really loves me” feeling.

I think, when you’re going through major change, and you’re really present and feeling it – you don’t always realize the summation of what is occurring.

Baselines tend not to be minute by minute play by plays. But they *do* happen and all the sudden you’re in your boyfriend’s kitchen as his wife, you’re packing his family as your own and you know the trust between you is green and ambient and maybe even a little psychotic in its love.