Words in Sentences – Page 43

A Shrimp Taco Away – 7.1 @ Bellingham House Kitchen

July 1, 2020July 1, 2020by ErinLeave a Comment

It is amazing to me how many ideas I have on how to control things.

I have had half a million ideas on how to control the food in this household in the last half hour alone (each time prompting the first line of this blog post).

I have had ideas on how to curb what the teens eat out of the freezer at midnight. How many flaming hot cheetos makes sense to eat in one sitting… How to balance kids wine with watermelon, why you should finish this bag of chips first before starting a new one…

It is true: I do find actual joy and solace in gems like how long big batches of popcorn stretch and perfectly hiding David’s rhubarb raspberry pie in the refrigerator.

And though I will continue to tuck Oreos away on top of the fridge, I grow in my desire to be more like David. David tends to shrug and laugh more than me, even when we are “almost out of snacks already”.

Even though he can grow annoyed by the incessant teenage grazing, his response is more “damn kids” as he pours the crumbs of the Doritos down the hatch. It loosens me up. I like being like that better than trying to control things. :)

***

I was tucking away a water bottle when I thought of my mother. I had just had one of those creative ways to shame come to mind and I was instinctively compelled to change my thinking. My mom would get so stressed out in the kitchen sometimes. And, because life is inevitably stressful and over the kitchen sink *is* the perfect place to cry, I don’t want to waste stress free days allowing anxiety about how the ice cream is gone.

Like for sure ice cream and anxiety are not supposed to go together.

Today was a marvelously relaxed day. The weather was perfect for being inside and keeping the kitchen humming. Eat, drink and be merry. No need for anxiety.

***

If I spend my time coming up with fun little rules and red tape, not only do I risk the joke being on me when the food I wanted them to avoid goes bad… I miss out on sharing the laissez-faire vibe with my soon to be husband.

If I was talking to the kids right now on how to make midnight meal decisions, I would not be writing and taking little peeks up to look over at him: enjoying a shrimp taco at the counter and watching the end of the Blackfish documentary.

It’s not the kids’ fault that I find self identity in an organized fridge and a clean kitchen floor. Nor is it their fault that I was raised with four others on a potluck budget, where you bank on church events for feasting. My love of a well run kitchen can sometimes take precedence over my actual love for them. And – for obvious reasons – I challenge that as wrong thinking.

I have a feeling as I keep letting go of my grip and desire to manage the snot (nod to COVID) out of the kids and, instead, replace that grip with being present and communicating: serving them and encouraging them, that I will resemble more and more my childhood best friend’s perfectly cool mom.

Laid back, comfortable behind the kitchen counter, a steak sizzling on the cast iron grill behind them. Ask her for a ginger ale or a pizza and you’d get a “sure, babe” through an afternoon buzzy smile.

See? Doesn’t that just sound so much better?

The end. :)

Take A Little Time @ Elizabeth Sation in Bellingham

June 30, 2020by ErinLeave a Comment

A sip of beer tastes especially good when it’s on a day off of work. A staycation of sorts, David told me for the second work day in a row that he was “out of office”.

I smiled. “Wait, really?” He’s off today??

“Well yeah babe, I took the whole week off when I realized you still were.”

I had imagined this whole week being one of him in pockets of hours in the basement, coming up for meals and early happy hours and loading up kayaks. That sounded fun, but it’s even better now that our week is now getting day dates, 1pm beers, new walks and mornings where we get to finish the movie we started the night before and drink coffee under a blanket well past 7:30.

I am thinking so many thoughts: about my zoomer daughter, step-parenting steps, Covid world beauties like lots of space and clean everything. I’m thinking about dynamics in relating and ping pong balls, peaks of sunshine and foggy grey fern lined walks.

But mainly – I’m thinking of how relationships really do grow. You really do find partnership out of friendship. Slap happiness and teamwork, poetry and Oregon chai lattes.

More pictures of the kids at some point – that’s it for now :)

5.NoCluetheDate – Hedge Trimming @ Bellingham

May 17, 2020May 17, 2020by ErinLeave a Comment

I’m convinced you might not fully know somebody until you have seen them with hedge trimmers.

…Matter of fact, you may not fully know yourself until you have seen yourself with hedge trimmers….

Though we likely are not starting a landscape business anytime soon, we indeed had our way with some overgrown shrubs, trees, bushes, etc.

It all started with me wanting to clear out a pad for a little fern + silver heart + begonia garden. Hours later, we had scuffle hoe’d the heck out of what is now set up to be a sweet shade garden complete with a stone bench, European smoke bush and snowball climbing hydrangeas.

The back of the truck is packed with limbs and David and I are sitting on the front deck. “I like having two houses…” he just said to me.

I thought the same thing this morning. As we were pulling things out and I was checking out the fungus on this tree, right where the trunk was begging me to put some violets, I thought “I can’t wait to go and see my ferns at Webster… curious what has grown…”

As David was trimming this bush with full artistic abandon, I couldn’t help but laugh.

Trimming hedges gives you the opportunity to taste the freedom of not over thinking yet, also, feel compelled by the idea of what might be a little bit better if thought about *for just a moment*?

I took over the trimmer out of pure curiosity and relished in the hilarity of all the ideas: I could make this bush into a shape… how about a “C”…. why not our initials… sharing with David, laughing at our reckless landscaping that was making everything look better… touched, at least… seen.

The fall seems the same way to me: schools still distance learning? What’s best for each kid? What will travel look like and feel like? What does each house look like in its ability to comfort and house 7 people at once?

For as far as I can see, we have two houses in two places. Two gardens and two front doors. Two fridges that need milk, eggs and ribeyes and two master bedrooms where we both want to be at the same time.

It means double the thought (at least more than we put into this sorry ass shrub in our front yard) but it also means double the opportunity and ideas.

All to explore, together, for sure.