Sit in a quiet space. See to it that you feel a great amount of comfort, as guided by your intuition. You can do this meditation on a person you have lost personally or on behalf of somebody you know who is grieving. You do not have to know the person personally to be able to stand in the gap for those who have buried their family or friends. You may also think of a cultural loss – such as all of those lost in this pandemic and their family and friends who mourn them.
- Mug of hot water
- Light a candle
- Favorite perfume or oil
- Article of clothing that fits loosely, feels soft on the skin
- Draw the curtains or play with the natural light
- Place a mirror in a thoughtful position
- Toss a blanket in the dryer for a bit
- Dab the lips with vaseline, rub lotion onto the feet or massage the wrists
Once you are situated, have your phone or printed paper with these instructions nearby. Read a section and then sit with it for a moment. When the mind gets restless (which may be right away, that is fine) move on to the next section.
- Breathe in through the nose and sigh the exhale out of an open mouth
- In a seated pose, circle the torso forward and then back, curving the spine. Think about “knocking easy tension” off the body as your circle. Let the neck and head be a part of your movement, Get into it.
- Your meditation while breathing in this manner and moving in this manner: “Be Near, Assurance”
- Continue circling, breathing with this meditation until you feel a little buzz, you grow weary, you naturally stop. Pause in the stillness and continue with the meditation “Be Near, Assurance” and bring your loved one, family or friend, to mind and notice the sensation in the body.
- Breathe in through the nose and sigh the exhale out of an open mouth, allowing yourself to be audible in your exhales
- Stretch the body out on a mat, blanket or in your bed – take a full body stretch.
- Position a cushion or firm pillow under the knees. Roll a blanket under the ankles. Allow a thin cushion under the neck. If you have an eye cushion, lay it over the eyes.
- Your meditation while breathing in this manner, in this pose, will be “Assurance, I see you”
- Rest in this pose for anywhere from 6 – 15 minutes. Feel free to set a timer or simply just rest. Witness the breath and bring to mind any thoughts, memories, smells or nostalgic remnants of your loved one. As you experience this pose, have the words “Assurance, I see you” accompany your feelings and the thoughts or images that arise.
- Breathe in through the nose, allowing yourself to make a snoring sound. Sometimes it takes a minute to find this! But a classic “waking snore” can relieve a lot of tension and add an element of humor to your practice that burns a little stubborn ego off.
- Lay on your right side. Position a pillow between the two legs. Ensure the head is supported. Position the body against a firm cushion, a pillow up against a wall or a bolster in order to feel a sense of support at your back. Hands to clasp or in prayer pose is ideal, but go for comfort above all else.
- Your meditation while snoring in this pose will be, “I assure you”
- Rest in this pose for anywhere from 6 – 15 minutes. When the snoring naturally subsides or if it becomes “work”, let it go. Notice the freedom possible in repeating “I assure you” on an inhale without having to say “who” is “you” or “what” you are assuring anybody for. Rather, the energy and compassion behind such words are what we are manifesting in the repetition.
- Allow the breath to come and go as it may in your final rest
- Lay on your back once again or with the legs up the wall, especially if you have anxiety or have had an anxious day. Support the body similar to in pose 2.
- Your meditation while resting in this pose will be, “I am here”
- Rest in this pose, inviting the person you have loved and lost to see you. For the spirit to draw near. For a sense of calm and peace.
I will be praying for all of those taking this practice. I pray regularly for the grieving, for the suffering. If this is you, know you are being held.